All the seminary degrees in the world don't matter if the truths that fill our brains don't infiltrate our daily living. That's the thought that really sobered me.
I had studied Hebrew and Greek. I taught Bible studies in our church and counseled women on how to walk out this Christian life. But my heart and home was a complete mess.
Behind the exterior of a happy, Christian marriage, I criticized my husband and desperately wanted to control him. I thought things that would make me blush if you knew. And even (sadly) regretted ever saying "I do."
And our marriage slowly crumbled.
In that darkness I wrestled with God, trying to grasp His view of love and forgiveness and how that was supposed to play out in my life. I found new hope in His sovereignty, trusting Him to be faithful even over the suffering of His children.
It was a slow crawl to healing. But He faithfully restored our home. He transformed my husband. And He did a work in me that I wouldn't trade, in spite of the pain.
All the theology is pointless if it doesn't affect our daily living. Jesus meant it when He said to love those who hurt us. He meant it when He washed the feet of His betrayer. And He meant it when He said that we find abundant life in Him alone.